Thursday, April 15, 2010

How Nicholas lost his big-screen spark...

 

(Greg Kinnear or Liam Hemsworth? PICK A SIDE.)
Photo: FilmoFilia

I went to see The Last Song yesterday and I have to say, it wasn't quite as so-terrible-it's-really-kind-of-awesome as I wanted it to be. It was more where-is-the-story-going-and-why-is-miley-wearing-a-see-through-crop-top awkward.

The problem with The Last Song is that it tries to be two movies at once: the summer love story and the terminal illness tearjerker. As a result, both stories get cut short. Individually, they might have worked well (especially the second story). But together, they just seem opposing and artificial.

Nicholas Sparks' last movie, Dear John had exactly the same problem. For the first hour, the movie is dedicated to a cute, beach-side romance. In the second half, however, it becomes a different movie, dealing with heavy issues like the consequences of war and the sacrifices you must make for not-so-healthy family members. This quilt-of-emotions approach worked terribly, making both stories fall flat.

Sparks' best book-to-movie adaptations (A Walk to Remember, The Notebook), worked because they focused on one specific couple and their unique story. Yes, they ended in tragedy, but when the big death happened (cause it always does), it involved one (or both) of the members of the duo. As a result, the progression between euphoric love story and epic tissue tale felt more authentic and heartbreaking.

Nick - if you wanna make half-decent stories again, you've got to start simplifying. Go with one story and run with it. And leave the spiritual crises to Mitch Albom.

P.S. - Oh, and when you have a teen idol record a highly addictive ballad for your movie, make sure you actually have her sing it in said movie. I was waiting for my "I'm Not a Girl (Not Yet a Woman)" moment, but alas, no sparkly dice. 

Mood Music: "Gives You Hell" by Lea Michele

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